Incase you are fairly new, for the past 3.5 years, we lived in Germany, as expats. We repatriated back to North Carolina back in July. Moving to Germany, in 2019, was such a culture shock. When asked, I always tell people about the "expat rollercoaster," and how you experience all sorts of ups and downs your first year of expat life. By year 2 you usually have found your place. Years 2 & 3 I was my happiest, but in Year 3, I knew our time in Germany was coming to an end. What a crazy mix of emotions it was. So sad, scary, happy...all of the things.
Fernando did a seminar, when we first moved to Germany, where they explain the difficulties of being an expat. He said they emphasized how moving back to your home country will be even harder than moving to your new country. The culture shock going back home has a bigger affect on you. You probably think it sounds crazy, because it's going home, but it is so true. Back story, I was born and raised in North Carolina. I moved to Florida in 2013 for Fernando. For us, Florida was home, because it is where we got married, built our first home, and had our children. While NC would always be my "home," Florida was OUR home. When living in Florida, we always longed to get back to NC, to be closer to family, especially after having the girls. Now we are here, so whats there to complain about, you ask?! I think it is only natural to miss a place, you called home for 3.5 years (Germany). I think it is natural to miss things, which meant so much to you - riding my bike all over town, walking my kids into school, sitting at the playground chatting with parents for hours, etc. I think it is natural to miss a place which had such a huge impact on your life. I think it is natural to feel sadness.
The way of life in Germany was so different. I could do an entire series on the differences..maybe I will. For now, one example: in the 3.5 years we were there, I put about 3000km (1800 miles) on my car. I have put 1800 miles on my car in the US, in just two months. Let this sink in. 2 months verses 3.5 years. How is this possible you ask?! I rode my bike or walked the girls to school almost everyday. In winter, it would get tough because of the rain, coldness, and darkness, but we did it as much as possible. I rode my bike to the doctor, to the dentist, to get my hair done or to pick up pizza. (Ahhh Pizza Roma, we miss you. My girls haven't found a pizza in the US they like.) I took the train to go shopping and to go out to eat. I essentially drove my car to the grocery store, only. It may seem so small, but it was such a peaceful part of life there. Now, I dread driving 10 minutes to Target. Never thought I'd say those words. Ha!
Okay back to checking in and the expat rollercoaster...
Where am I today on the expat rollercoaster? Before I answer, this is not for sympathy or not me complaining. I am simply explaining the real life emotions an expat can/will go through.
Today, I find myself on the downside of the rollercoaster. Let me add, knowing these feelings would come, doesn't make it any easier. I miss my friends so much. I miss the simplicity. I wouldn't say I miss the travel so much - don't get me wrong, it was a lot of fun - I miss the simple life and the wonderful people. The friends I made there are some of the most amazing people I have ever met. I am so thankful, and beyond grateful for the bond we shared in our expat journeys. So many laughs, so many nights out, yummy brunches, and a few tears.
No school is perfect, but ISD was about as perfect of a fit for our girls as you will find. The teachers and staff were so wonderful. The parent community within the school made all the difference in my life. The community grew to be our family. ISD did a tremendous job of welcoming new families and providing them with whatever support they needed. Being able to walk on campus every day, and connect with other expat parents...I wish I had appreciated it more. Being able to volunteer multiple times a week - I wish I had appreciated it more. I know I have a blessed life. I know I am so lucky to have this life. We now have the yard we wanted so baldy, while in Germany. We have a larger home, and the space we needed in Germany. Most importantly, we have Chewy!! Even with this, I knew I was going to have moments of sadness. The people I met there, made such a huge impact on my life. I know they were hand picked for me. It is sad to no longer have them in my day to day life. Girls, when are you moving to North Carolina?! Knowing what I know from our move to Germany, I am allowing myself to be sad and to miss the life we had. I am giving myself a lot of grace this first year, just like I have with the girls. It's okay to cry, which I have done and will do a lot more of, I am sure. I will find my place and purpose, it just takes time.
The positive is knowing the upswing of the rollercoaster is coming. For example, being in NC for the Fall season and the holidays, how special it will be! We are heading to the mountains this weekend, and I can't wait to take the girls and Chewy (our first holiday with Chewy). Starting holiday family traditions is something I have longed for, since having Laney. We have always had to travel for the holidays, but NOT THIS YEAR. Y'all can come to us. : )
I am sure there will be a Part 2 and a Part 3 to this, but for now I will leave you with this. You can be happy where you are, while still longing for what you used to have. We are so happy here, in our new home with Chewy and are awesome neighbors. However, I speak for both Fernando and I, when I say we do miss so much about life in Germany.
Here are some pictures from our time in Germany.
PS. If you want to read more about what I loved or what I missed while there: check out these blog posts: Loved & Missed. I also have so many travel recommendations, if you click on the Travel section of my blog.
If you have any questions about our time in Germany or about being an expat, please ask away.
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